Indiana: Where all the cute, hipster boys at the coffee shop are wearing wedding rings and reading the Bible.
Hello and welcome to this special I'm-going-to-ramble-on-about-nothing-to-distract-myself-from-my-singleness edition of my blog today.
Do you know the best part about Valentine's Day? The Price is Right had a male model for its couples edition. (That and half-price chocolate the day after).
I have a V Day tradition of watching Drew Barrymore's "Everafter." But, when I went to pull it out this week... The DVD wasn't in the box. So I must find something else to do.
Things I could do that wouldn't be special/ out of the norm:
- Eat an entire pizza or pint of ice cream.
- Say "UGH"so loudly at Kroger when seeing the Valentine's Day displays that the girl at U-Scan gives me a look.
- Watch 13 back-to-back episodes of "Friends" on Netflix.
- "Favorite" guys on OkCupid in cities I don't live in just so I'll be ready to go "if I move there."
- Post a Tinder "moment" selfie to see who right-swipes my self esteem back into existence.
- Direct message cute boys I don't know on Instagram because they "liked" my photo.
New Valentine's traditions I could start:
- Having a significant other (lol. k)
- Something involving turkey or fireworks or pine trees with lights.
- Pretending it's just like any other day and that I'm fiiinnnnneeee. No really, I'm fine.
- Eating healthy and exercising.
- Celebrating those I love in platonic ways.
- Trolling guys I've dated on Instagram and commenting sassy things on pics of them with their new boyfriend.
- Sleeping literally 24 hours so I never know the 14th of Feb even came.
Love by the number:
- Tinder matches: 1,500+
- OkCupid likes: 1,7000+
- Other dating sites I've had accounts with I now don't use: 4
- Guys who've asked for my number at a bar: 1
- Guys I've given my number to on the subway: 1 (then I saw him throw it away when he got off - ouch)
- Craigslist Missed Connections filled out: 3. Replies: 1 (Hi, Ian).
- Dates to date: Probably around 20
- Guy who've I've had more than three dates with: 3
- Boyfriends: 0.
Things that could be my Valentine:
This bougie, glass bowl of chocolate
This peace sign
Pinky
This rain poncho
This cat
These 219 guys who "liked" me on OkCupid who I can't see because I don't pay for "A-list" [anymore]
Not Allie :/
If this selfie-listical didn't convince someone to love me forever then I DON'T KNOW WHAT WILL.
Happy Valentine's Day.
[Disclaimer: I say this all in humor - I actually feel very young and I'm happy being single. I look forward to the day when I'm not - but I'm in no rush.]